I want you to know that I’ve been watching you, and I’ve been listening to you. You have different stories…some of you have partners who are at work for days or weeks at a time, some of you have husbands who are deployed for months, and some of you are parenting completely solo- maybe through no choice of your own. I realize each of these circumstances are different from the others, and each comes with its own set of challenges. But the bottom line is, for some of you…you’re doing it all. All by yourself.
I want you to know that you are amazing. I seriously think the word is “super human”.
I’ve seen your tired be tired as you run your kids around to after school activities after putting in a full day’s work and planning to rush home to do dinner, bath and bed time alone. Night after night.
I see you, worrying about the slightest sniffle or cough coming from your little one because taking too many sick days risks the only income keeping you afloat.
I see you beam with pride as you watch your little darling dance her heart out or see your little super star kick the winning soccer goal knowing their other parent is missing out on yet another amazing moment.
I see the weight of the world on your shoulders as you wonder if you can bridge the gap for your child and play the role of both mom and dad for another day, another month…or for some of you- indefinitely.
I want you to know that you’re not only doing it all, you’re doing it all well. Your children are thriving. You are raising kind humans. You are showing your children endurance and commitment and determination and selflessness and love that they will mirror in themselves as they grow. You are enough. You are inspiring. You are strong.
I also know that 9 times out of 10, when I tell you these things, you dismiss me. You remain humble. You downplay your accomplishments and the difficulties that I can only imagine you face…but I hope that deep down, you see your worth. I hope that in your heart you know your children are blessed tremendously by your efforts. I hope that you feel pride in yourself for the life you have given them, and that you not dismiss for one second the truth that you are enough.
I also hope you know that when I offer my help to you, I want you to take it. Not because I think you can’t do it alone, but because I want to be a friend to you. I want to bring you dinner when you don’t feel well or when you’re having a hard time. I want to watch your kids when you need a free sitter. I want to be your shoulder and your listening ear. And your other friends who are offering their help? They mean it, too. This stage of life is hard. Parenting is hard. It’s hard with two parents in the house. It would probably still be hard with 4 parents in the house. We all feel it, and we can lean on each other.
Thank you for your example. Thank you for giving me a reality check when I’m angered over my husband being home an hour late from work. Thank you for the friend that you are to me. Thank you for not punching me in the face when I complain about not having enough time for myself. Thank you for the patience you’ve shown me. Thank you for the light you bring into the lives of me and my children and for the beautiful change in the world your kind little humans are sure to be. You’re making a difference and you are loved.
The Mama Who Sees You