It started innocently enough.
After bringing my son home from the hospital, myself, my husband, or another family member/friend held my son while he slept. He was up every three hours anyway! At his 2 month check-up, I revealed to my pediatrician that yes my son had started sleeping 5-6 hour stretches, but I was still holding him every time he slept. She was quick to tell me that I must stop this, because I needed to get some sleep for my own health and sanity. I said okay, but after checking out, I asked if I could speak to her in her office.
I sobbed and begged of her – how do I get him to sleep in his crib? He hates it. He hates when I lay him down. She had no real advice except to keep trying.
So I did. And my son “learned” to take naps in his crib and to sleep in a bassinet next to my bed which he did until 7 months of age. Then, there came something called a sleep regression.
Those are rough times for baby and mama. My son would scream on both sides of every nap and wouldn’t sleep for longer than an hour at a time during the night. Once he learned he could pull up in his crib, there was no getting him to stay asleep in there. The only thing that calmed him was sleeping with mama. I didn’t hate the snuggles. But I wanted him to sleep in his crib. Why? Probably because all the blogs I read about how children NEED to LEARN how to sleep in their cribs ALONE or they would be dependent on you forever. So every night I would attempt to rock him and put him down in his crib alone. Some nights it worked the first try, some nights it took my husband going in, and some nights it failed and he ended up in my bed.
Finally, one night, I was just too tired to attempt the transfer. So I took him to bed with me. We slept better that night than we both had in months. Thus, we became co-sleepers. I researched safe co-sleeping. I moved our bed against the wall and removed all bedding except my pillow and a fitted sheet to create the safest co-sleeping surface I could.
Now our routine has changed and we co-sleep every night. Yes, I could get more things done if I didn’t go to bed with my son at 7 PM. Yes, it would be nice to lay him down in his crib and have him fall right to sleep without crying or screaming. Yes, I plan to eventually move my son to his own room. Yes, my son is napping on me while I write this. No, I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Anyone else out there an accidental co-sleeper?
**Additional Resources**
6 Safe Sleep Ideas for Exhausted (and Imperfect) Parents
How to Keep Your Sleeping Baby Safe: AAP Policy Explained