I just finished two very busy weeks. Hours of continuing education, some part time work, a few substituting jobs, some volunteer work, and four very busy kids and their schedules, a sweet sixteen party and a trip to the DMV. Add in taxes and some visits to hospitals to see people and a dance competition and I am tired. Not to mention laundry, cooking, and carpool. I don’t think my schedule will get much better until November. But I caught myself thinking how I could never continue at this pace , that I really don’t know how I could ever work full time. I don’t see how other moms do it. I know they have to be just as busy as me. Am I completely lazy?
The I realized that no matter what the world out there looks like I have formed our family unit to function the only way I ever knew. It really is a modified picture of my childhood, and my childhood was a modified version of my mother’s childhood. I did not have a mother that worked. I have never seen the logistics of it all. I only hear about my friends lives and see it from the outside. I honestly don’t know how they do it. I am proud of them but I feel quite insufficient. I just don’t think I could ever work 8-5 and here are my sad little reasons why.
1. I don’t think I have enough energy or patience.
When I get busy I get irritable and crabby. I can snap in an instant and I sure don’t feel like playing.
2. I don’t know how I would get everything done.
I am done with life by 8 or 9. I do not want to do laundry or grocery shop or anything. So how would I ever get anything done?
3. My kids would completely freak out if I wasn’t available at their beck and call.
It’s a fact, my kids think I am literally at their beck and call 24/7. To drive, to pay, to cook, to re-teach a lesson, to have laundry done, and to be at the school PTA meetings.
4. I would have to retrain the whole family on a new day to day schedule.
My family wouldn’t know where to be when if it wasn’t for me. They do chores but they have no clue how things would have to change.
5. I really don’t want to work 8-5.
It seems too monotonous. I like my job. Here and there, evenings and weekends, stress and all.
I have heard that we all manage with what we are given. Yes I had twins; four kids in four and a half years, and somehow I managed. I managed with the help of my mom and dad, with lots of coffee, and many days in tears. Yes I managed. So in conclusion I could not work from 8-5 because I am a giant wuss. Thank you for the therapy session. It was eye opening!!!